Allo, Allo !!!

Today I had an appointment at our local hospital to follow up a scan I had a while back on my sinuses...I have been suffering from a stuffy nose for a while and today I went to get my results.
The appointment was with Mr Patel at 2pm....
At 2pm my name was called...
The Dr introduced himself as Monsieur Nicolas...oh la la..Bonjour!! 6 feet tall, blue eyes, slender and looking like a french Jude Law...I was certain this was not Mr Patel! He asked me how I was and then logged on to get my scan results. I sat there horrified as he showed me my scan images and pointed out the areas with mucus...yuk!!. He then said "follow me please"..He drew back the curtain and there was a reclining chair...a scantily clad fit man handed me a large glass of cool white wine...oops, sorry that was me fantasising..A stern looking nurse gave me a bib and told me to stick my chin out, then Dr Law asked me to relax....If anyone ever says relax I seem to do the opposite and rigor mortis sets in! He then produced what looked like 10 inches of rigid wire...STOP IT...Yes...it was a microscope for looking at the nasal passages...As he inserted it I confess I shouted "Ah Ah Stop...please!"..He then said "I think she needs anasethic!!"...how true!!
It was an eventful hospital appointment which ended with Dr Law prescribing a nasal sparay and follow-up appointment in 12 weeks...Let's hope Dr Patel is still away!!

Tonight has been equally eventful..Rhino has been allowed to leave the confines of LF's room and ventured to our bedroom..He played happily on the bed with Lf as I ran the bath ...Suddenly I heard the words..." Mummy...Is it OK that Rhino has pooed on your bed?"

Now I am going to change the sheets and blow my nose...it's been a long day...
x

I have converted...finally!!

Well, having lived the past 15 years with a brick in my back pocket I am now the proud owner of a sleek and shiny iphone!

When Apple introduced this amazing life-changing do-it-all singing dancing version of a mobile phone people queued to get their geeky little hands on them...now it seems everyone has one and I have must confess it is rather clever.

Standing in John Lewis yesterday afternoon I received an e-mail from my sister who lives in New York. Ping! I replied and sent her a photo of LF too...all whilst buying door knobs!!
Ping! A friend texted to say lets have coffee next week...Ping...reply sent. Taking my son to a birthday party I used the Map function..Ping! My iphone got me there!! " Look Mummy balloons on the door"...Ping!
The phone is, according to Big D, not just a phone and needs synching??? Sorry, you lost me there!! However I am sure there is a function on the damn thing to find me again...
The Apple Store holds tutorials to show you how to fully use the phones etc and if you need extra help I think you can book a special appointment with a Genius. Wow, my old Nokia just came with an information booklet and off you went!
Suppose I got to move with the times....

PS If you don't hear from me for a while it is either that I am synching or sinking!!

Sports Day

Today was my son's Annual School Sport's Day....He is not a very sporty kid and this morning told me he was worried. I asked him what he was worried about and he replied "the sack". My mind raced forward 20 years and I imagined my little boy all grown up and worrying about getting the sack from a job he loved. However, reality and back to the present day...it was the dreaded sack race that was the problem! I did my best to tell him that it wasn't the winning that mattered but the taking part etc etc and that he was just meant to have fun...how wrong was I??

Some parents, like me, were happy to hang around chatting and quietly confessing that the actual day was rather boring and slightly tedious...sshhhh, don't tell my son!! Other mums were over bearing, over zealous and determined that their child would win first place. Equipped with camcorders, camera's with telescopic zoom lenses and words of encouragement they cheered their kids to victory. How I laughed when Over Zealous Mum's little darling crossed the finish line and came fourth, the look on that mum's face was sheer disappointment...she, like her daughter, had not been prepared to lose...unlike my lovely boy who had no dreams of winning...he just wanted to remain upright in his sack which I can proudly say he did!!

Sometimes we must remember that our kids are learning lessons in life every day...we are not all winners and sometimes we lose...however, to lose with a smile and congratulate those that win can actually, in my book of life, make you a winner too!!

Oh...in case you wanted to know, Rhino, our hamster, is doing very well and hasn't bitten anyone for quite a while...LF adores him and I am thrilled that such a little thing brings him so much joy..

Friends

I was thinking the other day about an article I read that said the average woman had 5 real friends. I consider my-self lucky not to be the average woman as I have more than 5 !!

Friends are important to me....a good friend is really hard to find and even though I am 45 years old I am still making friends!

One of my oldest friends...in "friendship years" not age, has known me all her life...we speak often on the phone but due to distance we rarely meet up. However, when we do meet it is as if we saw each other yesterday...She knows me like the back of her hand...whatever that means!!

My youngest friend...in friendship years not age, is someone I see daily and therefore our friendship has had time to grow...I now consider her a real friend...one who shall be around hopefully to celebrate with me when we are old and grey!! V...You know who you are!!

PS If we continue to have highlights we shall be old but NEVER GREY!!!

My dearest..or best friend as some say, is a girl who I went to school with...she is now happily married with 4 lovely children and as a special bond made me god-mother to her first child...I always feel special being a god-mother and hope I am a good one. Does a £25 Top Shop voucher for Christmas and Birthdays make me a good one...yeah, hell it does!!!

I also have male friends...My friend G and I have known each other for 20 years...he is American and we met whilst travelling around Australia...we formed a friendship that has continued and grown and despite living thousand of miles apart we have communicated often...such friends are special for many reasons....they may not be able to hold your hand or be a shoulder when needed but words are powerful...Hey...what did we do before Skype and cheap international calls!!

Another friend who is dear to me I met via the internet!!..A vitual friend becomes real... I was going through a very painful time in my life and needed reassurance that my feelings were not unusual..Having suffered a miscarriage at 13 weeks at age 39 I felt very low....I googled this and found myself in a chat room with similar like-minded people..Thats where I found my friend P...I was her maid of honour 2 years later at her wedding and we meet up often to chat about life, husbands etc...Although she sadly remained childless she has been a fantastic friend and we support each other as much as we can! If we had been searching for love on the web you could say we found it..

I could go on and on about friends but the following sums it up for me...

Friendship is when people know all about you but like you anyway!!

PS If any of my friends are reading this and haven't been mentioned its only because LF needs a bath and Big D needs feeding...I just don't have the time to mention you all..However...you mean the world to me..xx

The Birds and The Bees..

My good friend V told me over lunch the other day that her 10 year old daughter was showing signs of moodiness, teenage angst and generally being horrid to her mum!! Sound familiar any-one??

She bought her daughter a book which explains the changes that happen during puberty in the hope that it may ease things a bit...knowledge is power and all that,..I remember reading Peter and Jane books when I was a kid and it explained, in simple detail, the differences between girls and boys and what to expect when growing up. To be fair I had a head start...Angus, our next door neighbour who was about 5 years older than me, had already shown my sister and I what he had that we hadn't got!!! And I am not talking about the swing in his back garden...I wonder where Angus is now, I never got to say thank-you!

My son's old school have already started sex education for the 7 year olds. One of the mums told me her daughter didn't reveal too much about the lesson but on a Sunday Lunch with the Grandparents she proudly announced that "Daddy has a penis and mummy has a China!!!"...Not sure how well that went down with the Tiramisu!!

LF has asked me the usual questions such as how do babies get in mummies tummys and why can't girls pee standing up...I don't want to tell him that nowadays petri dishes and ladies in Thailand may be the answer...now what was the question????

I believe that kids need to know the simple facts of life but not sex education...they are after all only 7 years old....Where is damn Angus when you need him!!!

The School Gates

Everyday, twice a day, I do the School Run! Weaving through the traffic I take my little Man to his Private School in leafy Hampstead...along with about 1,000 other mums on the run.

For some Mums this is the highlight of their day...seeing their little one's face entering the school gates and then collecting them later with a treat or two.

For others, like me and my Mummy Friend V, it is a somewhat routine task that just has to be done. Don't get me wrong...whilst we love seeing our kids after their day at school, it's the other Mums and Nannies that we have to tolerate!! Pushy, boastful and education-obsessed mums really don't interest me...I couldn't care less that little B just had his first violin recital at Wigmore Hall or little J is scuba diving next Summer..These competitive mums love nothing better than getting one up at the School Gates...and usually the best parking space!!!

My lovely friend V and I usually stand around chatting about our day, the nice pair of shoes we saw earlier or what we watched on television the night before...call us Dippy Mums if you like...we don't care!!

The School Gate Stereotypes are easy to spot...

Dippy Mum....thats me and V.

PTA Mum...Knows everything and everyone! Never misses a deadline to bring in a consent form or empty cardboard boxes for some school project..would never leave PE Kit at home and has everyone's contact numbers stored in her phone!

Buisness Mum...attached to Blackberry and very stressed!! Always seems distracted and vacant...

Uber-Nanny..Fluent in 3 languages and prepared for anything. Takes the kids swimming after school then manages to get them to do all their homework, eat all their vegetables, have a bath and wash hair and ready for bed at 7pm!!...secretly I want her...Or want to be her....and she gets paid!!!

Yummy Mummy.. Arrives in her 4 x 4 with personalised number plate, usually dressed in black gym gear with immaculate hair, make-up and sunglasses. Brings delicious expensive cup-cakes as treats at pick-up and almost seems to skip back to the car with her off-spring...I assume there may be medication involved but that's another blog I think!!

School Gates....love 'em or hate 'em are just another challenge for Schoolmumontherun !!

Complicated Coffee..

Today I went out for a coffee as my home is full of painters and the coffee machine is under a dust sheet somewhere...

What I want to know is when did coffee get so complicated!!

I went to Starbucks as I fancied a cool Frappucino...I stood in line and was amazed at the different orders. My favourite was from an American lady with tight black leggings on and a baseball cap with WINNER on it?? She ordered a Venti Iced Half-Caf Toffe Nut Soya Latte, light ice, no whip with extra shot...what the hell is that I thought.
When it was my turn to order I almost said " I'll have what she's having" but wasn't too keen on the Soya..Instead I ordered a tall Coffee Frappucino....

Like everything in life it seems we over complicate...I long for the good old days when a coffee was black or white!

Once I settled into my comfy chair I was disturbed by how many people were either talking on their mobiles or tapping away on Laptops...I longed for the old days when we used to go out and had no mobile phones or PCs...all we had, if we were lucky, was an ansaphone at home taking messages!!

As I left Starbucks I noticed the American lady with the baseball cap....she was chatting on her I Phone whilst using her Mac and drinking her complicated coffee....WINNER sums her up!!!